its freezing here, somehow.  woke up comparatively late but relatively early. slept late. blahs.  home alone, my head's spinning, slowly and it seems something's tapping my head from inside. ass. breakfast-kitkat.

its coming to me everytime, and everytime, silence followed.  hopefully next time, everytime, i'll go to it, without it. 

maroon5 running against the spin. with bits of lyrics falling off its track.




i could see myself,
a porcelain figure.
so adored, held,
so admired, displayed.
then again, i could see,
myself nudged over a cliff,
air like memories,
through my filtering brain,
the time i'm most alive:
at the edge of death,
until i'm shattered,
of anger, of tears,
i'll be swept away in oblivion.

but no, i am not porcelain,
i'm all flesh and blood,
i'm, though, the filtering mind,
of streaming thoughts,
of life un-lived,
of things undone,
of love unloved.

i could borrow a mouth,
to speak my words,
sing my songs;
but no its not mine.
i could borrow a life,
of someone who lives,
to live mine,
but no its not mine.

but could i return,
what i could borrow,
only by the means of death? 
 


i'm sorry,  i truely am, but i know once a week is too little and it is not of me to live like that. it'll live on my brain. i'll be left with a hollow mind with memories rebounding off walls of my head. 

For you.

_____________________

 

blah blah. lalas. watched king arthur. yar. scared bout tomorrow's html thingy. i'm rusty. wash me away. guess i'll stay with maroon 5, couldnt find that song. yet. shit. wish wish. on and on and on and on............. bought "the game" and "dare devil" ciao

For you.

_____________________

 

finallae.... track tomorrow... LIGHT training.. just the thing i wanna hear. havent trained in a long time. played 1 on 1 soccer. almost cant play de. need cash. oh! i havent cut photos! woots. k, gonna go cut then sleep le. woot.

For you.

_____________________